Something IS wrong . . . with YOU

Photo Courtesy This Roller Coaster Called My Life

Right out of the gate, if I have to call you every time to converse or just to say “hey, cat, dog” there is something wrong.  I often state that loyalty is a two-way street and question if people are driving down a one-way.  To my surprise I have experienced a selfish, one-sided friendship that has become more of an association.  It disappoints me to say the least. There are no excuses for not “making the time” to talk with someone that you acclaim is your best friend whether they are of the same or opposite sex.  The elephant in the room is YOU not the friend that you have recklessly tossed to the backburner of your life.  Have you ever had “friends” that are conveniently there and supportive when life is good, but seem to become sparse when life knocks you down.  Friendships should be reciprocal, most specifically those that have been in existence for years.  When you come to a peaceful place of accepting the imperfections of a friend, there should be no unrealistic expectations of your friendship.

I find it absolutely amazing how often people play the victim in a friendship. Thirty-two years has taught me a tough and painful lesson about letting a "friend" screw you over and over and over again.  I am an imperfect individual, however, none of the men and women in MY life that I consider friends/family can ever fix their mouths to say that I:

~Don't support them

~Are jealous of their relationships (ie. marriages, committed, newly involved)

~Distance myself without communication

~Don't share various important aspects of my life

There comes a time when friendship that is aged like a fine wine MUST be reevaluated and uncorked to assess the emotional stakes brought to the table.   Anything that links me to you in friendship, for example, liking my status or checking in on Facebook during outings that you avoid to do, does not reflect poorly on me. It only pronounces how much of an introverted and veiled lifestyle that you live and how you treat what others may call a blessed friendship as one of damnation.

So consider this a rebuttal via one of my social media outlets: blogging, to your third person Facebook and Twitter status.  I have given relentlessly and in such a self-less way. As I am a typical type A personality, I weighed my pros and cons to find that some have exhibited on countless occasions the complete opposite of loving a friend.  When you begin to think, therefore, that something is wrong or weird or different in a friendship, it is, it’s . . . YOU!

Let me end this post by thanking the outstanding women AND men that have been constants in their friendships to me and me to theirs. From my core, I love you ALL!

Have you ever experienced a one-sided friendship? Did they spin the bottle to play victim?

Salute,

San, The Red Head

The Workout

I'm trying to lose weight. I have to admit, this it the heaviest I've ever been and I cannot stand it.  I’m trying to lose weight. I have to admit, this is the heaviest I’ve ever been and I cannot stand it. It’s so easy to put the weight on, but extremely hard to get it off. I recently bought a treadmill and told myself I would walk on it every day. That was a lie! I do get on and use it, just not as much as I should. I have to give myself credit however; at least I don’t use it to throw my clothes on it. It’s taking me a lot to get motivated and my will power is not the strongest, but I did something today that may not be a big deal to most people, but it was a big step for me, I left my house to workout. See, you have to understand me and my excuses; Yes I said excuses, for not working out. 

First, I don’t want to leave my house to workout because I have to tote my 3 year old son along and he can distract me. Second, it’s either too hot or too cold to go outside and walk. Let’s face it; this Georgia weather can be very tricky.  Third, gym memberships are too expensive and the ones that are affordable, have no options for child supervision. These excuses are just a few I use on a daily basis, so you can see why doing a real workout was a big deal for me. My friend Tranae told me about a group workout, that is free and because it is at a middle school track, the kids can ride their bikes and play freely, but it was outside. I knew I would have to compromise on something, but I actually enjoyed it, not the actual workout itself, but the atmosphere. It started in the early evening, so we had some sun but not too much. We were able to move at our own pace without feeling rushed and even when we did our drills, we all complained a little bit, so I knew I wasn’t the only one sweating and hurting. Everyone was very encouraging of each other and had great personalities. I actually felt good when I left, even though my muscles would disagree. I'll definitely go back, although I won’t be able to go after I get my hair done this week, excuse number four!  I think I’ll have a glass or two of Moscato to celebrate! 

Cheers!!!! 

Jenn