Wednesday, July 6, 2011



This is not a male bashing post.  It is written on behalf of my experience in dating, being married, divorced, and re-entering the ‘single life’.  I titled this post Clueless because it was the only term or phrase that I could use to provoke directly how I feel.  Some of the men and to be frank, boys stuck in adult male bodies (I know…I know what I said “not a male bashing” post) have the slightest idea about being in a relationship with yours truly and some of them sadly have no idea of “how to date” AT ALL.  Before I go pointing fingers, I can assure you that serious self-reflective moments have taken place on various occasions before presuming the aforementioned.  Men, you think that it is frustrating dating us, but what about the underlined questions in dating you.  

I write this to be helpful and not to belittle, but some of you have or know great women that you could “wife” and choose not to do so because of your arrogance, selfishness, and /or guard in protecting your heart.  Clueless as defined by Google is having no knowledge, understanding, or ability.  Truth be spoken, some of you are still attached to former relationships, some are bitter from heartbreak {not all women are the same, so stop medicating old wounds with new love}, some are still attached to their mother with little understanding of not only, how to be in love with a woman, but how to 'be' with a woman, some choose to be a womanizer…you know establishing emotional/physical connections with several women, but never seeking to be monotonous with any of them, some choose to cover their sexual preference for other men with an aggressive and sexual dialogue about what they want others to think they do with women {just be openly gay, love and live your life}, and some of are afraid to exercise vulnerability which handicaps any potential of having a relationship.  

Fellas, when you are staring your ideal women in the face: don’t sleep on it, don’t over analyze it, don’t screw her and the relationship over, and don’t be an asshole. Seize the damn moment!  Take her into her arms, knock on her door until she answers, love her assertively even when she is difficult, and contribute constructively, physically, spiritually, and emotionally to making her a better woman for herself. Do not be clueless! 

Ladies and gentlemen: What characteristics about the opposite sex do you think renders them clueless?

San, The Red Head

1 comment:

  1. OMG, you just hit the nail on the head with this one and I pray that the guys reading it do not take this post offensively. I know some people that defininitely needs to read this and I will be passing it along!!